If I could teach every empathetic person one relational/emotional skill, it would be making self-care a priority that comes first at LEAST half of the time. Constant caretaking without sufficient rest is damaging for the caretaker, the one who is being taken care of, and the relationship itself ( Read more... )

icon: "voltaic (me, face at a sharp angle staring out of one eye with a slight smile and streaks of rainbow light on my face)"A myth about demisexual people that I wish would go away ( Read more... )

icon: "interconnectedness (two bald purple-skinned people in the ocean: from Joan Slonczewski's "Door Into Ocean")"
(This is part of a post I made 3 years ago: relationship anarchy: we each only do what we want / my intentions & desires in all connections)

I am committed to doing my best to always:

respect your personhood: never mock parts of who ( Read more... )

icon: "progressing (a deeply, vividly green forest of thick vines and trees, with a tunnel running through where unused train tracks lay)"Note: I am of course assuming that it was not an intentional violatiom because why would you read this if so. I'm also writing this in the context of a relationship but it mostly applies to casual encounters as ( Read more... )

icon: "contemptuous (my face with bold cat-eye makeup, with a disgusted expression: eyebrows drawn together and down, eyes wide, lips curled up in the middle and down to the sides in an exaggerated frown)"I've been watching "the Path" and the main character is having a crisis of faith because the leader of the religion might not have done a miracle ( Read more... )

icon: "ADD-PI (two electromicroscope photos of crystallized acetylcholine, overlaid & warped in several ways)"I realized the other day that people who are not on the A-spectrum (Autism, Aspergers, ADHD) probably have no idea what it is like to experience brain overload, so I want to try to explain. When I am dealing with ADHD overload, all these ( Read more... )

icon: "strong (a photo of me in warm light with my hair down around my face, staring intensely into the camera in a defiant mood)"I have become more assertive again since getting on the right meds for my anxiety (starting last October I think). I wasn't expecting this but it really highlights how much my reaction to danger is to become meek and ( Read more... )

icon: "ADD-PI (two electromicroscope photos of crystallized acetylcholine, overlaid & warped in several ways)"
These tips are not for everyone! some are only possible with certain privileges. I'm sharing in hopes that some parts of this will help people with a similar brain and life to mine.

1) plan your bedtime and train your body to a set sleep ( Read more... )

icon: "disassociative (a digital painting of a stylized person in profile with wide open screaming mouth and arms up with palms spread wide. Head and hands flow into strands like blood vessels)"
( TW/CN: Aziz Ansari's sexually coercive behavior )

icon: "honesty (me, outdoors, gazing straight at the camera with a solemn expression)"A few months ago I realized, through watching a friend who I see rarely react to my dynamic with Topaz, that Topaz and I argue -- or appear to argue -- a LOT. We use playful complaint to release irritation; this is not conflict but can look like it. We use ( Read more... )